Little Bundle of Contradictions~

I feel like decaying today. Grateful to Priscilla Ahn that she captures my thoughts with such tenderness and euphemism. Such a sweet way to say I wanted to expire now.

I was a little girl alone in my little world  
who dreamed of a little home for me. 
I played pretend between the trees, 
and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, 
and laughed in my pretty bed of green.

I’m ready now, I’m ready now, 
I’m ready now to fly from the highest wing.
I had a dream.

I hurt myself today to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain. The only thing that’s real. The needle tears a hole the old familiar sting. Try to kill it all away but I remember everything. 

What have I become my sweetest friend. Everyone I know goes away in the end. And you could have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down. I will make you hurt,

I wear this crown of thorns upon my liars chair. Full of broken thoughts, I cannot repair. Beneath the stains of time the feelings disappear. You are someone else, I am still right here. If I could start again a million miles away, I will keep myself. I would find a way.

meiday:

Please don’t confront me with my failures
I have not forgotten them

My Mom - Chocolate genius

Only the lifeless stay at a certain age forever. Mom halted at 35, she would have been 43 today. Years have passed, and comprehension is still an illusion smoldering me wholly in perpetuum.

Though I know, my mom, my sweet mom, she will remember my name.

Black Lab - Say goodbye

Now I’m waiting for that setting sun to burn me down the day I’m done and spread my ashes out along the beach. But I find these days are pretty long this war with you goes on and on and I love you as I’m lying through my teeth. I find it hard to be up on this wall now I find myself trying to make a hard call. If I can’t say it – if I can’t say goodbye. If I can’t say it – if I can’t say goodbye I know you never will and twenty years of hell will rain down upon us like frogs upon the pharaohs. I have to say goodbye. I have to say goodbye goodbye.

ksmeanswhat:

I’ve waited all my life
If not now, when will I?

_{Irog, for you. :)}

Norwegian Wood - The Beatles

Still on a Norwegian Wood high. I’m done reading the book. After burying myself in, I am afraid I wouldn’t be able to put into words how beautiful it is. Like how Naoko struggled on saying what she had to say but not able to come up with the right words. Just experience it for yourself, I’m no good at making a review.

Echo - Incubus

Theres something about the way you move. I see your mouth in slow motion when you sing. More subtle than something someone contrives. Your movements echo that I have seen the real thing. My biggest fear will be the rescue of me.

skippertheeyechild:

Sugarfree - Burnout (Ulit)

Masaya - Bamboo

Break ups. Endings. Goodbyes. Why do we always justify its pain? So what if Bamboo has already broken up and my earliest fangirling memories could be traced with Vic Mercado? So what if I grew up listening to Ebe’s voice of Sugarfree from Sa Wakas up to the “where the earth kisses the sky”?? Who’s hurt? Who’s sad?

 I’ll take a quiet life/A handshake, some carbon monoxide.